When the Time Comes

11.1.09

Moon in Aries

The morning after a Halloween party excursion finds me just right back to feeling most comfortable in my own little nest. Even though CB’s home is exceedingly beautiful, small but loaded with loveliness, a real work of art like everything she does, I do not want what I do not have (Sinead O’Connor).

Daylight savings time ended early this morning. We’ll be tired, to bed and up even earlier than we had been all summer. It will actually be the same time but, to the world, we’ll be very early birds or will we be early worms?

I can be obsessed by interior design. It is one of the things I have always wanted to “do”. I have a great opportunity to do a room here at DarcyArts world.

The living room really needs help.

I was all gung ho thinking about, imagining a rich beautiful tile existing beneath the crappy rug there. On closer in spection it is really old tile dark brown with some not that attractive beige streaking. Could it be from the 40s? I think it is possible.

I am worried about taking up the carpet, crappy or not. Will it cost me in the end? It really depends on how long I live here. And there is another puzzle.

At this point in time I have no concrete vision of my future. I love that because I can get freaked out if I feel I am leading a predictable life.

The acceptable way of functioning says I should absolutely be married to a path at this point in my life. I should have all or nearly all of my ducks in a row. I should own things bigger and more valuable than a guitar amp, a couple of cobbled together workbenches and a closet full of comfortable clothes.

I think I’ve always felt more akin to the dharma bum life. I trust the light to provide sustenance. I truly believe “you can’t fall off the mountain”.

I would venture to say that all the people at last night’s party had lots of ducks and have spent their whole lives making rows and rows and rows. There were ginormous battleships of SUV lining the streets out side the glittering house.

People were costumed in many ways. 100% fake hippy was the most popular costume for prominent couples. Often Halloween costumes represent the skin we desire to slip into temporarily.

How would it feel to be all about LOVE and non-materialism? How would it feel to laze about and smoke pot and listen to music all day?

How would it feel to be a witch observing the seasons and aligning oneself with spirit?

Or Dog the Bounty Hunter, living a bleached-blonde life, high on adrenalin and testosterone accompanied by your big-tittied wife?

It was so pleasant to sit with Frank outside on CB’s well-groomed, artfully engineered patio. The stars were out. The moon was nearly full. We watched the people talk to one another.

I wondered after a while if I had been accidentally invited, just a name in a bank of contacts. The email sent out en mass.

We didn’t stay long. Long enough though for me to really feel the need to get to my living room makeover project and then that extra second more to ask myself why I shouldn’t just get rid of everything extraneous under my always temporary roof. I want to  be ready when the time comes to fly.

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